Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Stop Ripping Me Off

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I think I can be a very judgmental person.

Depending on the situation, I sometimes have a tendency to quickly form an opinion, and then refuse to change it. Perhaps I may change it if presented with some extremely compelling evidence to the contrary, but that hasn’t happened yet. It is not something that I am proud of, but something that I have come to accept.

I never used to be this way. By my calculation, it really began on September 9, 2007, also known as the day after my wedding day. I strongly believe these two events are unrelated - no correlation whatsoever. Again, no one has provided any compelling evidence to the contrary.

This judgmental-ness has become more defined with age, to the point where many would consider me to be curmudgeonly. I feel like everything makes me angry. I certainly have been for the past week. Here are all the things that made me angry this week:

- The GO Train – rarely does a day go by where there isn’t a late train, and then I am constantly inundated with stupid emails telling me how late the trains are. There are also repairs happening at my station right now so only half the exits open on my way home. Just seeing a GO Train employee infuriates me. I fought the urge to take a ticket collectors hat and vomit in it last week. The GO is always trying to rip me off.

- Buying Produce – Why is it so friggin impossible to find some decent produce anywhere? I don’t even mind paying for it – I shop for it at Longos! I bought a container of organic baby spinach at Longo’s two weeks ago. When I got home, it smelled funky. All grocery stores are trying to rip me off.

- Delayed Election Promises – I read two articles this week about election promises from the Conservative Party of Canada. One promised income splitting for families with kids…IN FIVE YEARS. Another promised fitness tax credits for adults…IN FIVE YEARS! I am suddenly very angry for wasting my time reading the articles. Newspapers are trying to rip me off.

- People that have cooler jobs then me – My friend Mike has recently taken a sweet job with Maple Leaf Sports and Entertainment. I am a public sector management consultant. Mike hangs out with Darryl Sittler. I hang out with accountants. Mike participates in conference calls with representatives of all the NBA teams. I participate in conference calls with, um, other consultants. Life is trying to rip me off.

- Being Sick – I have been sick with a sinus cold on and off for the last five months. It really gets in the way of my training schedule – I haven’t been on a spin bike in two weeks, because the last time I tried spinning when I was still sick, I ended up getting much worse for much longer. Germs are trying to rip me off.

- Chicken-Shit Prime Ministers – The man challenges his main opponent to a one-on-one debate, and then pulls his sweater vest over his head and hides behind under a desk when the challenge is accepted. THIS is the guy who leads my country? Politicians are ALWAYS trying to rip me off.

- Snow in April. Seriously? Global warming is trying to rip me off.

Everything makes me angry. Almost. People who donate to the Ride to Conquer Cancer don’t make me angry. I love them. And they risk getting an unexpected cuddle from me.

Please don’t let this stop you from donating. Xoxo.